Hi Iamthatis, could you give any more information to provide context for the difficulties you are experiencing? It may be useful in order to give more specific feedback/ assistance.
Okay, I will provide details, and attempt to be brief.
Our community owes its togetherness in large part to a man who survived the psychedelic 60's and came out on the other side with a significant depth of understanding. He bore no illusions about what the 60's was.
He was deeply involved in the Gurdjieff work, sufi teachings, esoteric Christianity, and was given responsibility to share the Hopi prophecy as well. As part of his life path, he also inherited two very significant and potent Native American ceremonial ways, which were kept in their original blueprint and kept safe from New Age contamination - something he warned us of, constantly. So, he was a walking library, sharing many of the topics touched on in the Wave series. He was also the one who introduced me to the Cassiopaean experiment, speaking highly of the experiment, saying that the information provided here comes as close to describing the true nature of things as any he could name. In many ways, he is a true spiritual teacher. Our very own Laura.
He recently crossed over to the other side. I was one of his primary caretakers during his dying time, which involved international travel and great expense on my part. To say 'it was hard' was an understatement. It became evident to myself that there was some significant hyperdimensional interference going on 'in and around' him.
When he crossed over, our community met. We were quite aware that all of what he gave to us is very sensitive - and the PTB would rather have such knowledge destroyed. We spoke about preparation for this attempted destruction. Our metaphor was as follows: when a large animal who takes up a large territory passes on, something will come in to try to take its place. As said in the Wave, always be prepared for attack, know the methods of attack. Luckily the Wave readings had prepared me for this. I shared what I have learned, specifically about people close to us being used as attack vectors, and the way in which an Agent Smith phenomenon can manifest to break us apart. Also, the way in which thoughts and emotions can be played like an instrument to create disharmony.
The disharmony is here. It arrived in terms of a divide and conquer tactic. As usual, this has happened through the 'path of least resistance' - desire. Temptation. We live in a small village at the end of a road in the mountains. Small communities can be an echo chamber. It is a delicate social fabric. To be brief, after his passing, a young man (M), who had been in a fraught relationship, left his partner (P) and decided to pursue her sister (S) instead. Not her blood sister, but that is the significance of this decision. This was not done in an open and transparent way at all. P was completely devastated, as expected. She has managed, miraculously, to manage to continue to wake up each day.
M is our teacher's adopted son. This pattern played itself out nearly a year ago, as well, when our teacher's daughter (D) committed adultery - with a man in the community. Not in the exact locale, but in our circle. The consequences, obviously, were devastating for the wife (W) who was betrayed. She was totally torn apart, even suicidal. The marriage was very recent, and hopeful, the product of years.
So, his son and his daughter both came under attack and could not withstand it. Some form of pattern is playing out here. There is also a recognition amongst us of this pattern - even the son and daughter see it, and know it, but in large part it has been painted over and justified with spiritual bypassing. "That's all in the past now." There is also an attempt to police emotions that is incredibly naive and harmful.
W was also one of our teacher's caretakers during his dying time. During my time overseas, I was to support her through her very recent trauma as well as attempt to comfort and our spiritual teacher in his dying time - he was coming under significant attack as well. Without an understanding of intentional suffering, I would have broken under the weight of this task.
We have been doing our pitiful best to address this all. We have prayed together, spoken, and continued to share and discuss. I see now as I write this that sharing the Love Bite material on Bernhard Geunther's website is appropriate.
Now - M and S are going off travelling, to enjoy their new relationship. What are they leaving behind? W is here, living with P - two traumatized women living under one roof. I have been living with them as well - again, given the task of caregiver, listening to them, sharing what I've learned from The Wave, all the while attempting to work a full time, laborious job as an organic farm hand - and this full time work is also just at the moment that my hay fever allergies skyrocket and shut down my respiratory system. Recently my machine broke down and I couldn't finish a work day, I had to go sleep in my car. So now, I may also lose my job.
So, there is betrayal, which sows distrust. Now, people are leaving to go off and have fun while others are here to attempt to maintain and nurture the garden of what was once a wonderful spiritual community that was trampled underfoot. We are grieving for the death of our teacher, and also the distrust caused by the actions of those we love.
It is obvious to me that there was heavy interference here, given the nature of our live's work, and the severity of the attack.
For those of us who choose to remain here, tending to this garden, trying to coax it back to health, I ask for trance breaking tools because we are in desperate need of them. Anything at all to help us weather this storm, keep the love of this work alive, to continue on our soul journey together, inspiration, a light to guide us onwards.
Thank you for reading. It is the first time I have given an account of my experience in summary like this. This writing itself has unlocked some tears. So thank you for that blessing.