I first heard the news through my wife. At the time, my thoughts all stopped, my mind went silent as if respectfully acknowledging an exercise of supreme autonomous choice.
When the shock wore off, I knew the kinds of articles and blog posts would be showing up on a google search would present all kinds of references to 'mental illness' and speculations would be thrown around.
Some have said Robin Williams was AD/HD. I don't know that Robin ever publicly confirmed that, but many in the community accepted him as such because he felt like 'kin' so to speak. Robin has stated that he used 'manic' episodes in his comedy, and when asked by an interviewer about clinical depression, Robin said "No. No, not clinical depression, but, y'know I get bummed..." So, some people have also read "bipolar" into that.
It's tough to explain to people how frenzied you can get if you're neuro-chemically incapable of self-calming without drugs, yet drugs make you feel like a shell of yourself with shallow emotion when emotional depth is part of who you are or how you define yourself. I know there are members of this forum who can attest to that.
I don't know what all was happening in Robin's life, but I posted before on how a certain depression had brought me to the point of suicide.
The following story is kind of an example some may understand or recognize.
I was recently in contact with an acquaintance who, along with her son, had been diagnosed ADD previously to this event. The son had recently changed schools. The new teachers were more antagonistic towards kids in general and the son in particular. On a day when a teacher said something mean to the son, instead of 'shrinking back' like most kids are conditioned to do, he lashed out in what was deemed an "aggressive" attitude.
Thing is, the kid has always been very smart and was on track to early college entry, but now found himself in trouble. Of course, the mother was also affected. The school district planned a disciplinary tribunal, the parents worked frantically to gather information and resources that might help the son stay in school. If he's expelled, he'll be viewed as a "violent offender" and told that a school just for violent offenders is where he'll be sent. Instead of an honor student he'll be considered a pariah. From there, college looked like an impossibility.
So, what effects can this kind of life situation have on certain people that don't fit the "normal" category? Your typical cheerful, creative self hops into the back seat. You dip into a depression that makes descriptions of bipolar read like a Disney ride, the one with the teacups.
You can't sleep, You can't eat. You alternate between deep chills and intense sweating. You can't cry. You're thirsty, but you always need to go to the bathroom. When you're that depressed or that far down, you're completely disabled. You're also scared to death. More scared probably than at any other time in your life. You can imagine or feel like your own death would be nothing compared to watching your kids murdered by an uncaring bureaucracy, your own family victimized by an uncaring social services or even your own life going down the toilet after a lifetime of giving all to others for their entertainment.
So then, you plan to get some help for that. When your kid gets in trouble or something bad happens to a family member or even in your own life and you become a basket case, it's not a good thing. But sometimes, neither is the "help."
Anyway, my understanding is that the Marin county coroner did confirm that Robin was seeking treatment for depression and that was just a statement of what was already suspected to be the case. We knew Robin Williams - each in our own way, maybe, but also partially in sync with him. And we know what the world is like.
So now, when someone asks one of our kids what it's like to "have ADD", the kids say "It's like having Robin Williams in your head. Does that make sense?"
Maybe, like hesperides suggests, Robin's psyche was built on an archetype consisting of irreconcilable forces...I don't know, but I do agree with Mikha'el:
Mikha'el said:
I will always enjoy you, Mr. Williams and I feel that you have made a great contribution to the world.
Indeed, Dead Poet's Society will forever stand as a suggestion for how to make a totally boring school subject much more interesting, IMO.