Session 13 July 2002

.The concept of "soul pool" sounds very similar to the idea of "group soul" that I read in Max Heindel's "Rosicrucian Cosmo Concept" book... As I can remember, Madam Blavatsky talks about similar concepts too...

I think that once the soul potential (for those who have it) begins to actualize in what we call 'time' then a process is set in motion
where even after death this process still continues and goes even beyond this soul pool that is mentioned into another state where some of its outer non essential elements may dissolve but its essential "substance" has the coherence to continue beyond this soul pool and does not dissolve fully so as to continue to develop (in other words even death does not stop this process) and it continues to develop (after reviewing it's previous life and so on) thru continued incarnations with ongoing possibilities of it's actualizations in 'time'. I often get the impression (and I certainly could be wrong) that each of our lives in this life are a 'fragment' of something greater and these fragments kind of unite thru repeated incarnations to continue the soul development and it's seating in 'actual time' along with the growth of self awareness.

I don't see time as something 'real' in itself, but rather as a sequence of linear perceptions that our consciousness flows thru and recognizes which we call 'time.' So what we call 'real time' is, imo, nothing more then a mathematical abstraction based on a linear sequence of perceptions (that our greater consciousness perceives or sees itself reflected in) of perhaps natural physical cycles but it's real nature is a limited condition of our greater consciousness perceiving shadows of some kind of higher space or 'solid' that exists in a more real sense (so to speak). So I think 'time' has everything to do with the state of our limited consciousness and really nothing to do with a reality within itself that we call time.
 
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When reading this transcript 'again' after a while, I find it very hard not to start creating a mental data base of the people involved directly in our (my partner and I's) daily life. One even starts wondering about one's parents, etc.

The part about attracting more 'portals' once we begin changing earnestly through self-work has come true for us, as we moved last year from the city where we shared a big place with several people to being just the two of us (on the edge of) a small village in the countryside.

Since being here we have been constantly been stumped by just about every new individual we connected with. Either we helped them (letting them stay a while in our spare room, work for them without expecting money in return, etc.) - whatever the case, we were used, exploited, and even as I told the people they were using us they just kept right on doing it until we broke ties with them. One at a time. And after long observation we came to the conclusion that nobody around us had any true feeling of empathy whatsoever, or just fleetingly when it suited their agendas.

Having been aware of the existence and M.O. of portals has protected us but only to a small degree. Our innate desire to make sure everyone is ok is stronger than our system of protection. We have many times felt as if we were inadequate for being messed with time after time, through one means or another. My partner is more the social animal, yet I am the one that endlessly gives his shirt away to the first robot that comes my way?

I am certain many here can relate. I just need to share that at 60 years of age, and a long period of self-observation and work, I still feel incapable of not letting myself be had. And the effect of always 'falling for it' is making me weary of connecting with more new people. As musicians and such, we are fine just working together with a select number of close friends, but even there, I am forever disappointed with others, then with myself. I wonder if anyone has managed to rise above this redundant scenario? If so, should we shut ourselves off, or look further for meaningful connections?
 
I am certain many here can relate. I just need to share that at 60 years of age, and a long period of self-observation and work, I still feel incapable of not letting myself be had. And the effect of always 'falling for it' is making me weary of connecting with more new people. As musicians and such, we are fine just working together with a select number of close friends, but even there, I am forever disappointed with others, then with myself. I wonder if anyone has managed to rise above this redundant scenario? If so, should we shut ourselves off, or look further for meaningful connections?

I think what you do here is first giving a person the benefit of the doubt that you "won't be had" which imo is perfectly OK but you lose sight of the greater reality (that is, the accumulation of many moments over long periods of time in all frames of reference and situations) that will help you to determine their overall (mechanical) behavior and in what situations there are greater possibilities that you will be "had" by your friends and associates. That knowledge over time is what I think is all that matters. What we do is get lost in time, lost in the little present moments by identifying with our moment to moment reactions regarding how we may feel about ourselves and others. Reactive feelings can change moment to moment but the truth of the situation is often seen in a flash of light coming from the region of the universe beyond time called eternity.

The identifications and wishful thinking blind us from the greater reality which can take a long time of observation and knowledge in order to make an accurate approximate determination one way or the other and even then we could be wrong. In these situations it might be best is to think in "opposite" terms from the get go and assume that the people you meet (including yourself) are 'man machines' from the start where you won't be disappointed if you are double crossed in some way that will leave you always disappointed since, when you assume the opposite position, you already saw it coming if it should ever occur. You may be pleasantly surprised when you see that there may be real soul behavior from impulses of conscience that you may see in yourself or others as well.
 
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