Thank you @Mari for pulling out the relevant parts of the Wave. Those were exactly the parts that stood out for me too. There is also Ch 70 (You Take The High Road and I’ll Take The Low Road), which may be apropos here too. It deals with how we are a bunch of brain chemicals, how some brain chemicals are addictive & cloud our thinking; how our thinking is often driven by emotional thinking (& programs) so that we’re often drawn to choose the wrong person.It also might be a key to Sex/Relationships.
In this twisted word, sex is taboo topic – which leads to shame, hate, denial, desire and ultimately possession. Depends on the programs one is modeled by.
So if a person approaches sex with no anticipation, with no desire to possess or change other person, but out of act of pure love and being one with the other person, than that could be the key to also include sex as the part of The Work as creation force in creating a better world.
But to achieve that, one first must strip all his/hers programming to realize themselves so are able to see if a person next to them is in tuned with him/her.
Only then this step of the Work is possible
These days sex can be either taboo or in-your-face depending on your sociocultural milieu. There seems to be a spectrum from being overly moralistic/prudish about it at one end to profligate licentiousness at the other. I think either extreme is unhealthy: one extreme (moralistic) promoted by religion & it’s attendant guilt, shame, hate, denial etc; the other by liberal sociocultural programming leading to over-sexualising of youth and excess promiscuity. I think what’s called for is a more healthy balanced attitude towards sex in general. So cleaning our machines, divesting ourselves of those programs helps towards having a much healthier view of relationships and sex.
I just finished Seven Nights in a Rogue’s Bed- I really enjoyed this story. Quite spicy in parts but I actually enjoyed that too! Both the protagonists are scarred by their past, but they seem to be aware of what drives them (eg Sidonie never wants to marry because her father & brother-in-law were tyrannical), and they somehow manage to heal those wounds with the other’s help. It makes the raunchy parts so much more wholesome.
I used to read this genre when I was in high school, so I’m not new to the idea of wholesome love (with sex being just one expression of that). I’ve learned to deal with the yearning for a wholesome love story by focusing on what I can do, which is to work on myself. If that significant other doesn’t appear, at least I can try and balance my left (male) and right (female) hemispheres of my brain. Conjugal felicity within if not without!
And if this group process helps anchor a reality where love, faithfulness, trust, home, family, friendship, chivalry, creativity flourish, then I’m all in!