Depression As A Stepping Stone (to Soul Growth)

[Oxajil]

Sure, I guess once we know why there are those lows and highs and what is all about it, we can go beyond that. But then, what is to be creative? I think that being creative is not always to be inventing new things, either music or visual arts or literature, or whatever. Being creative could also include facing in a creative and constructive way those periods of time where you don't have new artistic (or any other) ideas to materialize; and use those periods creatively, which can include, improving what you already created, helping others who are in a more creative time, or just acquire new knowledge; that's also being creative, even when you feel no immediate desire to create or invent new melodies, or visual art, or any other creative activity. Like keeping the energy moving to avoid blockage of same. Until we become so clean and pure that we won't cease to have the never ending flow of creativity from DCM

I very much agree, thank you.

 

[RedFox]

I think this is great advice. In my eyes, it's normal that your emotions tend to be seen in your work (if it's not a job, then you should be careful of course). And I think every emotion can produce something. If you're sad and angry, then you can express those in the way you would express other emotions. You say ''I just do not feel creative'', I also have noticed I have times of being creative and sometimes of not being creative, but I have learned that creativity is always there and you can pick it up whenever you want. If you say you can't because you are depressed, sad or angry, then you are preventing yourself to pick it up. If you stay open for the possibility that some kind of creativity input will come from you, even if it is ''dark'', then you might be able to pick it up and express your emotions like you would with the others (if you want to). Afterwards you could do some lab journaling, why you felt the way you felt, where it came from, what you experienced during expressing etc.
The thing is, we have and feel emotions every day, so why would we be able to express them in a creative way one day and not be able to do this the other day? It's something I'm thinking about.

You can either wait for the ''creativity'' to come, or you can decide to be creative. All the power is in your hands. It's not the rain, or grayness, of course it is if you wish to remain a machine. Influences from outside decide for us, coincidences decide for us, and that makes us feel like we can't decide for ourselves, but we can! Just as DCM is dark/light, good/bad, ugly/beautiful etc. so do we have sad/happy feelings. And they all have the right to Be (and to be understood and dealt with), and they can be expressed the way you want it.

I agree with Oxajil on this. I learnt the same thing during periods of depression. Something interesting though is this didn't go away when my depression became less prominent.....I still have the same problem (program) when I feel ill/physically drained/tired etc at these points I feel (think) 'I cannot do this'....once I say this I block myself (I've only just realised I'm doing it this way with my health).
Thing is, I managed to sort my health to the point where I am pain and fatigue free for a week or so, before it coming back....and I still had days when I felt (thought) that 'I cannot do this'!!! How odd is that?
Once you can see this is a program that runs no matter how you are feeling (to reinforce the belief that 'you cannot do')....you can start to separate it from how you feel (physically and emotionally) and watch for it running....without the separation you can confuse your (false) beliefs for who you are and how you feel, they can define you if you let them fwiw
As to depression itself...it seems mine has faded with the improvement in diet and practice of EE.

 

[Tigersoap]

I think there is Creativity as in DCM and creativity as in mechanical man trying to reconnect with a higher source.

I have periods of high creativity, where I am buzzing with ideas and don't have enough hands or time to work and I also have periods of low and mild depressions where I am working without an aim, trying to find new ways to re-awaken creativity.

I don't think that you can make yourself creative at will, you may have the skills to do a good job but it does not necessary means it will be that creative, meaning here that where won't be much heart in it.
It's either there or it's not really there (because I cannot see it), like Graalsword said, you have to keep building up because this may be end up very helpful further along the line, I've noticed this quite a lot that small steps into a direction will finally produce something in the end.

I am mechanical so I am probably just falling in and out of the creativity flow because of external influences. I think that maybe due to our presence on earth, this is only natural that there are cycles as there are cycles in everything, just a thought.

I think both times, high and low, are where I try observe myself to see if it is linked to food I eat, to narcissistic programs I have, and so on.

I know that for myself, being creative can also be a form of escape from what I feel and at the same time I can't escape what I feel because it will be projected into what I do without me being conscious of it all.

My two cents.

 

[Oxajil]

I think there is Creativity as in DCM and creativity as in mechanical man trying to reconnect with a higher source.

Not so sure what you mean here. So by being creative we are trying to reconnect with a higher source? Do you mean your Higher Self?

I have periods of high creativity, where I am buzzing with ideas and don't have enough hands or time to work and I also have periods of low and mild depressions where I am working without an aim, trying to find new ways to re-awaken creativity.

I don't think that you can make yourself creative at will, you may have the skills to do a good job but it does not necessary means it will be that creative, meaning here that where won't be much heart in it.

Hmm you know, if I would get the assignment to make something, then I am able to put myself in the position to do so, even if it isn't really a moment of ''feeling creative''. I would need to empty the mind of thoughts that don't have much to do with what I want to create, and fill it with thoughts that do have something to do with it. I can add feelings, fantasy etc. it might take some more energy than when being in a ''creative-mood'', but I don't think the product will be that much different. The energy and effort I put in it, comes from "my heart'', either way.

Perhaps inspiration and Will are some keys? Would we be able to be More (often) creative when we would have a stronger Will?

It's either there or it's not really there (because I cannot see it), like Graalsword said, you have to keep building up because this may be end up very helpful further along the line, I've noticed this quite a lot that small steps into a direction will finally produce something in the end.

I am mechanical so I am probably just falling in and out of the creativity flow because of external influences. I think that maybe due to our presence on earth, this is only natural that there are cycles as there are cycles in everything, just a thought.

Yes building it up is very nice. There is one project still laying here, that I haven't been able to work on for some time now due to lack of time, and perhaps also due to lack of inspiration? I'm just very curious if I can find that fire myself, instead of waiting for it ''to appear''. Maybe it's easier than we think?

You have periods of being depressed right? Well how do they go away, do they go away all of a sudden? Or do they go away by effort coming from your side? By using the Will, to do something about it? (Some people are depressed for maybe years, does a cycle apply to them as well?)
If we can, by effort get out of depressive periods, then why can't we have influence in the periods of being more/less creative?

Just because they ''come and go'', doesn't mean you're just gonna have to accept that. There is always input possible from your side, that is what I think. If you can decide for something to ''go'' at some point, then why wouldn't you be able to decide for something to ''come''? Or does it happen naturally, instead of by choosing Consciously?

Because of external influences we also might be more irritated

I think both times, high and low, are where I try observe myself to see if it is linked to food I eat, to narcissistic programs I have, and so on.

I know that for myself, being creative can also be a form of escape from what I feel and at the same time I can't escape what I feel because it will be projected into what I do without me being conscious of it all.

I guess it depends on how you deal with it. And I guess a network is always needed for help in trying to see such things better.

Just sharing my thoughts here!

 

[Tigersoap]

Not so sure what you mean here. So by being creative we are trying to reconnect with a higher source? Do you mean your Higher Self?

Oh me neither :)
I think we can just be creative within the limits of 3D even if we are part of DCM I am not sure we can do anything else than to try to clean up our machines here and now to reconnect to the higher centers, creativity is not only doing art but also to problem solving and finding creative solutions to mundane problems but maybe I am understanding this wrongly.

[quote author=Oxajil]
Hmm you know, if I would get the assignment to make something, then I am able to put myself in the position to do so, even if it isn't really a moment of ''feeling creative''. I would need to empty the mind of thoughts that don't have much to do with what I want to create, and fill it with thoughts that do have something to do with it. I can add feelings, fantasy etc. it might take some more energy than when being in a ''creative-mood'', but I don't think the product will be that much different. The energy and effort I put in it, comes from "my heart'', either way.[/quote]

Well I guess each person is different, maybe it depends as well about what creative fields we're talking about, some might take some time to create something while others have more instant inspiration.
There are no rules but I think that forcing creativity to appear at will is quite difficult, it may look like it's how it happens but usually it's more of a long process that develops in the background until it's ripe, sometimes unknowingly.
It happens that I work on commissions with a lack of creative output because I just need to do the job, I can tell the difference right away.



This video explains this process (and networking) in parts :

Where do good ideas come from ? by Steven Johnson

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NugRZGDbPFU

[quote author=Oxajil]Perhaps inspiration and Will are some keys? Would we be able to be More (often) creative when we would have a stronger Will?[/quote]

Good question, I think it does play a big part.
I'd say Will, Inspiration and Aim seem to go hand in hand, like the three forces, if one is lacking it's difficult to progress further.
So I think you need more than just wanting to be creative, other forces come into play.

[quote author=Oxajil]
You have periods of being depressed right? Well how do they go away, do they go away all of a sudden? Or do they go away by effort coming from your side? By using the Will, to do something about it? (Some people are depressed for maybe years, does a cycle apply to them as well?)
[/quote]

For me these periods have become more rare, or at least they do not impact me as much as they did since I do the EE and the diet.
It does not mean I cannot feel low or irritated some days but they don't overshadow everything else like they used to do.
I guess each person feels depressed due to different things like food, chemical imbalances, Haarp and so on.

In my case, and that's just my experience, like I said, I cannot be creative and have a good idea all the time, I need things to float in the background, sometimes for a very long time.
Sometimes and that's where I think I wasn't seeing this before, it's that when everything comes together in a short amount of time it's because there has been some preparatory work done before, the un-creative periods are just periods of gestations.
Not so long ago I would go on a narcissistic binge of "not being creative enough, worthless..." but now I accept these moments willingly.
Depression never really helped me to be creative now that I think of it but it made me realize things about myself in the long term osit.

Also this article from Malcom Gladwell called "Late bloomers" really helped me to put things into perspective, at least for me (Thanks to my wife for showing this to me).

_http://www.gladwell.com/2008/2008_10_20_a_latebloomers.html


My two cents.

 

[Bluestar]

This morning I woke with the realization that I was addicted to my pain. That I was actually identifying myself as this is "my pain", "my fibromyalgia", "my back injury". That this is me, my restrictions & limits due to the constant pain. This is just who I am. And that at times I wait until the pain is simply unbearable before I do something about it like take a pain killer. I thought to myself while lying in that half sleep/half awake moment, why do I do this to myself? Do I dislike myself so much that I am punishing myself? This seemed absurd to me. Then the thought, I am identifying with the pain, not who I am. Am I addicted to feeling this way? So used to the pain and discomfort that I find comfort in it? Or do I feel that I am just not worth it? Could this be so?

Yes depression sets in when I am not looking. My motivation is based on how my physical body feels. As well as my emotions. Sometimes it is like a pit in my heart and stomach that is just growing and growing into something that feels uncontrollable. Then all of a sudden the pit is gone and I feel a bit better emotionally. I can handle "my pain" Not sure what causes the shift. I figure realization is the first step.

Then while going through new posts, I clicked on this one and read what Gimpy wrote. Coincidence? ;)
Then Anarts reply hit a huge chord for me, thank you.

This pain is not truly me. It is a part of me due to incidences and traumas, just like psychological ones. It does not make who I am. Some of it can be fixed. So now that I see it can I overcome it? Have a lot of work to do here. Some of the other suggests have helped as well.

Working on diet, doing EE mostly POTS and some breathing. Doing BaHa when I feel I can handle it. Have adjusted the sitting positions to aide in physical comfort so I am not distracted. Mostly do it while lying on my back. I am not an overly depressed person on the outside. Yet at times on the inside I read a different story. Which sometimes comes at a surprise.

So thank you Gimpy for the courage to post what you did, it has helped in many ways.

 

[Graalsword]

Perhaps inspiration and Will are some keys? Would we be able to be More (often) creative when we would have a stronger Will?

It's either there or it's not really there (because I cannot see it), like Graalsword said, you have to keep building up because this may be end up very helpful further along the line, I've noticed this quite a lot that small steps into a direction will finally produce something in the end.

I am mechanical so I am probably just falling in and out of the creativity flow because of external influences. I think that maybe due to our presence on earth, this is only natural that there are cycles as there are cycles in everything, just a thought.

Yes building it up is very nice. There is one project still laying here, that I haven't been able to work on for some time now due to lack of time, and perhaps also due to lack of inspiration? I'm just very curious if I can find that fire myself, instead of waiting for it ''to appear''. Maybe it's easier than we think?

I think that creativity (in the wider sense) is what is not mechanical. When you break mechanicalness and do something new, original, authentic, out of mechanicalness imposed by the "densitynaut" overlords, you are being creative. Now what relation could be between this and creation in the sense of doing arts? Maybe it relates to the high and lows discussed above, and the breaking of that mechanicalness of letting us be driven "high" and "low" by doing what the system doesn't expect us to do, most especially during the "lows".

I also many times wondered about those people who are not more aware than average 3D earth denizen, and have unconsciously a very high level of inspiration even from STO sources. There are examples in fiction books, music, etc.. And there are those who new something and also had that inspiration too(maybe some paintings such as those from Da Vinci and others). In such cases, and most especially the first case, I think that non-anticipation played an important role. How can you create something new, with anticipation of results? Very difficult.

This pain is not truly me. It is a part of me due to incidences and traumas, just like psychological ones. It does not make who I am. Some of it can be fixed. So now that I see it can I overcome it? Have a lot of work to do here. Some of the other suggests have helped as well.

Working on diet, doing EE mostly POTS and some breathing. Doing BaHa when I feel I can handle it. Have adjusted the sitting positions to aide in physical comfort so I am not distracted. Mostly do it while lying on my back. I am not an overly depressed person on the outside. Yet at times on the inside I read a different story. Which sometimes comes at a surprise.

So thank you Gimpy for the courage to post what you did, it has helped in many ways.

I have observed a reduction of depression in my case since doing Eiriu Eolas, too.

 

[Psalehesost]

I think there is Creativity as in DCM and creativity as in mechanical man trying to reconnect with a higher source.

I think it is not so separate - everything anything in the cosmos does is the DCM expressing itself. All are tools/instruments of Being and/or Non-being in everything.

So our work on connecting with our higher selves is just a part of the creative outflow of the DCM, as is all creativity.

OSIT.

 

[Tigersoap]

I think it is not so separate - everything anything in the cosmos does is the DCM expressing itself. All are tools/instruments of Being and/or Non-being in everything.
So our work on connecting with our higher selves is just a part of the creative outflow of the DCM, as is all creativity.

Of course, but I think that the level of creativity of DCM or 6D density beings must be very different than from 3D beings, it must be linked to the ability to BE (or not), it depends on your choices osit.

 

[Horus_Risen]

I just want to say that this thread is extremely thought-provoking and helpful. I've been working towards understanding the transformation of negative emotions lately and this thread really hit the spot. :D

 

[NewOrleans]

Thank you for this, everyone. Terribly useful just when I needed it."The best way to get rid of melancholy is to make fun of it."

 

[Iron]

I have a question, and since this thread is also related to the role of the emotional center in the work, I think here may be the appropriate place.

Well, here it is... if on the course of studies, evolution and self observation, one realizes with all their being that human beings are reaction machines, can not be anything else unless they do some work and merely respond mechanically to situations, I think its only logical to assume that this man or woman that realizes this can not afford to be angry, or really sad or disapointed with his fellow man. I may be short sighted in this but I think that the reason of much of our negative emotions towards another is due to high expectations of another, and if the another is just a machine, maybe there is not a lot to expect other than programs running amok.
So, assuming that this reasoning is correct, if the person ceases to be shocked by the behaviour of another, that means that there will be fewer instances where negative emotions will be available for transmutation.
Is this an aspect of the inner peace Mouravieff talks about?

 

[obyvatel]

I have a question, and since this thread is also related to the role of the emotional center in the work, I think here may be the appropriate place.

Well, here it is... if on the course of studies, evolution and self observation, one realizes with all their being that human beings are reaction machines, can not be anything else unless they do some work and merely respond mechanically to situations, I think its only logical to assume that this man or woman that realizes this can not afford to be angry, or really sad or disapointed with his fellow man.
I may be short sighted in this but I think that the reason of much of our negative emotions towards another is due to high expectations of another, and if the another is just a machine, maybe there is not a lot to expect other than programs running amok.

Perhaps personalized anger (directed towards specific people) goes away at the level of development you are alluding to. But it is likely that anger at injustice, exploitation etc remains as a general form of righteous anger.

If one has reached a high level of empathy and emotional development, I doubt if sadness can be eliminated. I would think it would be natural to feel sad at the suffering of others while acknowledging and accepting such suffering as lessons in their life path. Such sadness would perhaps be a pure emotional function in contrast to the type of sadness or disappointment that comes from a sense of unfulfilled expectation of others which I think is an example of the intellectual center function of comparison working along with the emotional center.

 

[kenlee]

I have a question, and since this thread is also related to the role of the emotional center in the work, I think here may be the appropriate place.

Well, here it is... if on the course of studies, evolution and self observation, one realizes with all their being that human beings are reaction machines, can not be anything else unless they do some work and merely respond mechanically to situations,

This has been my observation as well. Actually it may be that the majority of people these days have even lost what little power they do have which is to even react to things. At least reacting to things has a degree of freedom in it to respond one way or the other and it requires a certain amount of sensitivity.

What I am observing is that many people have even lost that little bit of sensitivity and freedom to even react. So they are even less then reaction machines and more like passive automatons. They don't complain about anything, don't feel anything, don't think beyond cliches and don't get indignant at all regarding how they are getting screwed daily by the pathocrats in power. They'll do as they are told by any authority figure without any thought or question and will endlessly "adapt" to any situation as it goes from bad to worse, no matter how bad it gets.

I think its only logical to assume that this man or woman that realizes this can not afford to be angry, or really sad or disapointed with his fellow man. I may be short sighted in this but I think that the reason of much of our negative emotions towards another is due to high expectations of another, and if the another is just a machine, maybe there is not a lot to expect other than programs running amok.

Well, what I found is that it's more then a realization although I think it starts with a realization. For example, I constantly "default" to seeing myself and other people as being people who are fully conscious and awake and not as machines. This is generally my everyday state of awareness where I'll see people as non machines who can actually reason and think. Then I'll get disappointed, annoyed and even angry sometimes when all they will talk about is nonsense while this planet is literally burning to the ground and are totally blind to seeing how things in our immediate environment is changing, going from bad to worse on a daily basis. It's so obvious now!

Then I'll realize that this is how a machine behaves and in that moment of realization I'll see things for more of what they are and accept the fact that people are basically sleeping machines and then I won't become so negative and disappointed over it since there will be no expectations of expecting people to be conscious human beings. But it's a constant struggle for me to see people as machines in real time and maintain that awareness, Sooner or later I'll fall back asleep again after reacting to some stupid thing or another and then lose myself in the reaction. I allowed the reaction to get the better of me by identifying with it, allowing it to sap my awareness and I then become a sleeping machine myself losing the ability to 'see' people, or even get momentary glimpses of seeing people as machines beyond just an intellectual acknowledgement of it and along with that, not being able to see myself as a machine as well.

So, assuming that this reasoning is correct, if the person ceases to be shocked by the behaviour of another, that means that there will be fewer instances where negative emotions will be available for transmutation.
Is this an aspect of the inner peace Mouravieff talks about?

.
I think the General Law of Mouravieff will recognize when we are becoming more aware and it will increase its action on the world around us (and within us via our own subjective weaknesses) so as to keep us asleep and reactive. From my own experience I've found that these instances will ramp up as one's awareness grows so it might be best to consider that first and what that means and be prepared for it before thinking about there not being enough instances to generate negative emotions.

Having said that though I think that as the General Law intensifies its action as we grow in knowledge, experience and awareness then that same awareness will also help to protect us within that framework. But from my own experience it's a slow learning process and constant vigilance is always required otherwise one can always lose what one gains while dreaming that we are awake.

 

[Tigersoap]

These last few days I've been feeling quite "empty" and it's a horrible feeling.
I think I've noticed how much my emotional center was atrophied and all the things I could feel were pale imitations of what I imagine real feelings must be like.
I also realized that it's so really easy to fill up myself with outside impressions (music, images, ideas, consumerism) to try to avoid that emtpy feeling but it isn't working that much in the end.
I just try to ride it all and accept how I feel but there is a lingering sadness and melancholia.
On a sidenote, I often forget that people in general are not the people on this forum but when I remember it, I've noticed how I am not bothered by people being a machine because I am one myself, I am just very baffled at how some people don't think at all.