The Taste For Things That Are True

Laura Knight-Jadczyk

Dear Readers,

When we first began to attempt to do serious research in the fields of metaphysics, UFO's, anomalies, and spiritual development, we had absolutely no idea that we would encounter what we did. We knew that we had lived somewhat sheltered lives, but then, so have many other "normal" people. We most certainly had never had any of the wildly improbable experiences that we read about, though the coincidences in our lives were off the scale of what could be considered "normal." Neither of us has, to this day, in any kind of fully conscious state, seen an alien or anything that really couldn't be explained away rationally. But again and again, a subtle "layer" of reality has manifested itself in small signs, clues, hints, of some greater reality in which our own seems to be embedded, and which informs us, based upon hard work and open mindedness, that there is certainly more to our apparent reality than meets the eye.

Working with these small clues, our brains, and a lot of hard work, we have apparently been able to interact with this deeper reality in a direct and satisfying way that has led to many interesting conjectures and insights about our world, our place within it, and our future. Right or wrong, it is our work - many thousands of hours of it - our results, our conclusions that we share on these pages. Nothing more, nothing less.

However, as we have noted on other pages here on this site, there seems to be something at work in our world that does not like what we are doing, and which drives susceptible people to react to us in any number of ways that have had extremely negative effects on our lives. A friend of Ark's, a professor of physics and mathematics at the University of Florida (whose birthday party we will be attending next month as part of our "normal" life), once remarked that we ought not to spend more than 15 minutes per day thinking about the paranormal because it just "isn't healthy." Maybe he is right.

What have we found in our safari into the jungles of the paranormal?

Well, the first thing that we noticed is that, despite the fact that these subjects have been the main areas of exploration for philosophers and "natural scientists" of olden times, in the modern world, it seems to be the field for mostly lunatics and the bottom feeders of society in enormous numbers. That is the cold, hard fact. And as much as our readers, intelligent, reasonable, open-minded, and true seekers, might like to wish it wasn't true - well, there it is. That's what IS. We have found it to be almost impossible to find "the real thing" out there in New Age Land.

Anybody who is a general failure in real life can become a Star in the world of the Paranormal. And, for the most part, that is what we have found. And we know that our readers have become equally disgusted and disheartened. It is truly depressing to find that 80 to 90 percent of the work and the workers in such intriguing and worthy subjects, constitutes lies and confusion piled to heaven - often cases of innocent ignorance, I might add.

We had hoped to be able to offer an alternative: true Philo-sophia - love of wisdom. Inspiration, and hard work.

We have written at length about what seems to be a Matrix reality of deception, and that there does seem to be some sort of social engineering going on. We have also noted that what we have come to call the Thought Police are extremely active in all levels of society, from politics and economics, to early childhood education and religion; from the ivory towers of physics, to the chemistry labs of pharmaceutical companies. Something is dreadfully wrong with our world, and we have been pointing it out whenever we find it - the Emperor is Naked! - and somebody is VERY unhappy about this.

We admit to having been somewhat innocent dupes on more than one occasion. Since we have always approached our lives and personal dealings with other people in a sincere and fair minded way, we were certainly not expecting to find that so-called "spiritual seekers" could and would behave like what my grandmother referred to as "trash."

There is another factor involved here: the internet as both a boon and a bane to mankind.

On the one hand, the world wide web is a marvelous opportunity for open exchange of ideas, experiences, growth and harmony. On the other hand, it is a mask behind which some of the most atrocious predation I never hoped to witness takes place.

In recent weeks, we have heard many remarks from readers and members of our egroup about other groups that have been "invaded" by these predators. A fruitful and worthwhile discussion among a hundred or so people from around the world, taking place in almost real time, can be utterly destroyed by one or two "bad apples." We have watched one discussion group after another close its doors and fade into oblivion because of this factor, and we simply cannot understand what drives a person to behave like pure embodied hate.

Would these people behave this way if they met each other in the flesh? Does the internet just simply enable psychosis and neurosis to thrive and multiply? Is it going to become the den of cyber mafia and virtual vampires? Are decent, hard-working, honest people going to be driven off the internet?

Or is it just because we are engaged in paranormal research? Is it only in the effort to bridge science and metaphysics that we find ourselves the objects of abuse by cyber-trash?

During the past week or so, we have had to sit down with our children, show them the terrible, hurtful lies that are being written about us by these contemptible, solipsistic, malignent, and lawless people. We have had to show them that these people have no compunction about writing about the children themselves, using their names, possibly endangering them, certainly embarrassing them, and most definitely hurting them psychologically and emotionally. We have had to explain to them about people who choose conscious evil; people who are malicious, evil-minded, envious, obnoxious, and loathesome. We have had to explain to them about people who are so twisted that they derive gratification from deceiving other people and hurting other people. And we have had to explain to them that these people pose as "good and helpful and friendly" when they meet you and when you have something they want, or something they wish to destroy, whether they are being directed by some nebulous Control System, or their own internal deficiencies and general failure at life. What is more, we have had to explain it to ourselves.

And of course, the children have asked us: Why do you even do it? Why not just walk away from the world such people inhabit? Why not just go back to "normal life," and forget about it. Let the world do what it wants to do, let everybody just go away and leave us alone?

And frankly, as I write this, I am hard pressed to answer that question. Why, indeed?

As it happens, during the past week, the egroup engaged in an interesting discussion on the subject of the real meaning of Service to Others and Service to Self, and the implications and possibilities of the differences between Wishful Thinking and Lies, versus Objectivity and Truth and how these are expressions of Love of Self as opposed to Love of Others. A group member re-posted the C's comments on love:

Q: (L) There are many teachings that are promulgated that Love is the key, the answer. They say that illumination and knowledge and whatnot can all be achieved through love.
A: The problem is not the term "love," the problem is the interpretation of the term. Those on third density have a tendency to confuse the issue horribly. After all, they confuse many things as love. When the actual definition of love as you know it is not correct either. It is not necessarily a feeling that one has that can also be interpreted as an emotion, but rather, as we have told you before, the essence of light which is knowledge is love, and this has been corrupted when it is said that love leads to illumination. Love is Light is Knowledge. Love makes no sense when common definitions are used as they are in your environment. To love you must know. And to know is to have light. And to have light is to love. And to have knowledge is to love.

She then added: "What Laura and Ark do on the website is love. What Ark pursues in his research is love. The books Laura writes are love. When we network and share ideas and experiences and insights here on this group, it's love. I think the Cs are saying here that it isn't only that our motivation to gain and share knowledge comes from love, but the actual knowledge and lessons, both given and received, are also love. At least, this is what I've come to believe is the meaning of this passage." (Linda H., USA)

This, of course, goes right to the "heart" of the matter, so to speak.

As I wrote in Amazing Grace, when I first began "receiving" information back in 1985, it began with a very particular series of questions about the true nature of Good and Evil.

The Laws of Probability tell us that, without any intelligent control, 50% of the time events would occur leading to great good and benefit. Factoring in intelligent decisions to do good would bring this average up to about 70%. Yet we can clearly see that this is not reflected in our reality.

The Bible and most New Age teachings tell us that the reason things are so bad is because it is all our fault! We were an "experiment in Free Will" that went bad. We have screwed things up so much that now we need help to haul ourselves out of the soup. If we believe in this or that version of who God is, then at some point in time we may enjoy eternal bliss in the heavenly spheres, but if we make a mistake and believe in the wrong "god," we don't have a prayer - it's the soup of Hell for you, honey!

Another aspect of such teachings consists in the idea that if we just think nice thoughts, nothing bad will ever enter our reality. And we must not look at evil because it just doesn't exist in our lives unless we believe in it!

Well, I had a problem with these ideas. Over the many years that I had worked as a hypnotherapist, I discovered that the vast majority of people want to do good, to experience good things, think good thoughts, and make decisions with good results. And they try with all their might to do so! With the majority of people having this internal desire, why the Hell isn't it happening? What did this mean? Where was the fly in the ointment? The rotten apple in the barrel? It all came back to the issue of Good and Evil. And I knew from my studies up to that point in my life that what is called "evil" by one group is very often "good" to another group. Something was seriously wrong with this picture.

Well, I had a lot of rather simple questions that had been tormenting me for most of my life anyway; I had just simply turned my back on them for a few years while trying to live a normal life as a housewife and mother. I could no longer do that. The question had grown so big and compelling in my mind that it demanded attention or I could no longer continue to draw breath.

[At that point in time, due to health issues] I was forced, by the universe, as it were, to find other outlets for my energy. I decided that this would be the perfect time to master the art of meditation and, perhaps, discover the answer to this question of Evil. Many strange things began to happen around me at this point that have been related elsewhere so I won't describe them now.

What is of importance to this narrative is that, after my regular meditation exercises, I would sit up in bed, surrounded by piles of books and notebooks, reading and taking notes. As I would read, questions would begin to form. The instant that questions were framed in my mind, thoughts would simply pour into my head so fast that I thought my brain would explode.

These thoughts always and only came in response to the questions that I would pose mentally about whatever I was considering at the moment in my studies. The urge to write these thoughts down was so overwhelming that I would spend literally hours a day, filling page after page in longhand. One might think that this was a draining activity. On the contrary, it was energizing and seemed to be facilitating the healing process. I still have these notebooks. I gave them all to Tom French when he asked for them. Tom French wrote in his article:

In addition, the overwhelming volume of her activities -- not just the channeling sessions themselves, but thousands of pages of notes, essays and papers -- testified to the genuine depth of Laura's interest. She was clearly devoted to these questions long before we entered her life...

There was a curious aspect to this experience: if I didn't write the thoughts down, they would stay there; they would sort of "back up" like dammed-up water. As soon as I had begun to write again, it was as if there had been no break in the flow of thoughts whatsoever; they picked up right where they left off.

Well, I didn't think this was too strange at the time. It seemed to me to be merely the process of thinking. And in a very real sense, that is what it was. But that leads us to the question as to where some "thoughts" originate, particularly when they are so completely outside the range of personal experience and knowledge. Some of these "thoughts" were so startling and novel that I would literally freeze in mid-thought and ask "where did THAT come from?"

At some point, I decided that I must find out if these ideas that were coming to me had any basis in fact whatsoever. I most definitely needed more input! So the answers that "came to me" pointed me in the direction of certain studies that otherwise might not have been part of my experience.

Those who know me understand fully that, even though I have studied it all my life, I have always been a skeptic about the "paranormal," including such things as channeling. I have rarely read any so-called "channeled material" that wasn't just psychobabble word salad. Sure, there are a lot of high-sounding phrases that seem to convey encouraging concepts and useful information, but when you really analyze it you find that it could just as easily be composed by a computer program that puts certain words and phrases together in certain pre-designated patterns, with nothing new or really innovative ever being said. Also, as a hypnotherapist, I have spent too many years digging around in people's heads not to realize fully the mind's capacity for self-deception. Thus it was that, as these ideas came to me, I was compelled by my rational and reflective nature to research each concept to discover if there was any way it could be supported scientifically and objectively.

I subscribed to a library service by mail, and soon began ordering and reading book after book on subjects that ranged from geology to physics, from psychology, to theology, from metaphysics to astronomy, and about everything in between. As I read, I found many pieces that fit in the framework of the information that was pouring into my head relating to these very subjects. I was both surprised and energized to find that the answers I was getting weren't so crazy after all!

As I pulled on the thread of Ariadne, it seemed that the entire fabric of my religion unravelled and there, concealed behind the religious myths lurked the imagery of many of the facts and ideas of science. But there was so much more in the myths and legends that I became convinced that scientific research was only beginning to catch up to things that were clearly known by the ancients. And as I re-phrased these myths into scientific terms, there emerged an idea so amazing that it took my breath away.

The idea was Macrocosmic Metamorphosis in Quantum terms. This is the fundamental theme of the Cassiopaean Message, and so I cannot doubt that it began in my rose garden on that Spring day so long ago with the bursting forth of awareness that the Universe really does answer the question that is sincerely and openly framed.

Ark wrote recently:

C's are pretty good at giving clues that need scientists to understand them. ...

When I write "C's" - I really meant "Laura". Because for me there is no doubt that C's are a "hyperdimensional extension" of Laura. That is to say, an expression of that which is Laura here that is manifest as part of the C's transmitting from their location - in the Future.

"We are you in the future." Now, who is "you" here? Good question. I think "you" is Laura. I think "you" is also the "human race". Individuals are like electrons. Electrons are "Fermions" - but in supreconductors they form "Cooper pairs" Cooper pairs are Bosons. They form a "Bose condensate" - a one "whole" consisting of entangled Cooper pairs. Our "hyperdimensional extensions" reach over space and over time. To "talk to yourself in the future" a radiosource in Cassiopaea can be a handy thing.

Note that Laura wrote Noah, which deals with quantum theory applied to the macrocosmos long before any [obvious] channelling. She was channelling while writing. Of course today Noah is updated, with lot of new material that is the result of research that came later, especially recently.

Channelling is for Laura simply a way of expressing what is deep within, and what is deep within her mostly deals with the most amazing insights into the mysteries and workings of this universe. I could write more, and I will write one day, but here let me just say that as a scientist I am amazed by how "scientific" Laura's thinking is, and also how giving her internal "drive" is.

As we have written in many, many places on this site, telephoning into the past can produce paradoxes unless it is done according to rules we are only learning. And the only way we have of learning these rules is by diligent quality research by uncorrupted researchers.

Who is corrupted? For instance those who publish fake biographies implying having degrees that they do not have. Or those who demonstrate by their actions that they have hidden agendas.

There is also another way of separating wheat and chaff - by analyzing the effect of the material on different people, by analyzing why it is so violently attacked by certain individuals.

But the real check goes only through quality research in the areas dealt with in the material. As you probably know most of the so called "sacred geometry" is simply garbage and disinformation. C's mentioned several times concepts related to this "area". Thus "phi" was mentioned, and importance of prime numbers too. We do not understand yet what is the implication, if any, of these comments. Research by qualified researchers is necessary. Similarly with physics, astronomy, etc. That is what Noah is, in part, about.

The material on this website - now in the many thousands of pages, or so I am told by readers who have printed all of it out to read more conveniently - is a labor of love. When I wrote Amazing Grace, I wrote it as a map of the soul for others. Many readers write to express amazement that I am willing to write about all my human foibles and failings and mistakes and just plain old thick-headed stupidity. I say over and over again, I am a slow learner, but once I have got it, I apply it to my life, and the changes have been nothing short of miraculous. If one other person can be helped by my mistakes, I am happy to expose them. If one other person can feel less alone by knowing that somebody else has been there, done that, and survived, it is worth it.

The Wave Series, the product of literally thousands of hours of research and writing and even channeling as I write, is also a labor of love. It was written in response to the hundreds of questions we have received from readers. For three years in a row we spent about $10,000.00 per year for the books, research papers, and materials necessary to produce this work, including the site fees and related expenses. We spent it knowing that it was an investment in humanity, and if one single person was helped by this work, it was worth every penney. Tom French wrote in his article:

Money never appeared to be the driving force behind Laura's activities. She lived modestly, driving a used van and raising her kids in a house that was in constant need of repair. Laura showed scant interest in making money from her paranormal activities. She charged minimal fees for her sessions, but they never amounted to much. Several years ago, when she made some transcripts of her channeling sessions for us, we paid her $100; since then, she has given us hundreds of more pages of these transcripts and has refused to accept a penny more for her trouble.

We still drive the same used van. Our house is still in constant need of fixing, and we have consistently refused to charge fees for our sessions with C's or reading fees for our site. And since I retired from hypnotherapy, when and IF I agree to work with anybody, it is always a gift. (What's more, I wouldn't have charged Tom for the copies of the transcripts if it had not cost me that much to have the copies made at a print shop!)

However, the issue of money was not an item of agreement between Ark and me and Frank. On January 22, 2000, the following exchange occurred:

Q: (L) As you know, Tom French is finishing the article and it is supposed to be published either on January 30th or February 13. They have turned it into a "love story," and you guys are being presented as "cosmic matchmakers." Comment, please.
A: News media are mischievious.
Q: (F) One thing about it is probably is that everybody who wants to find their soul mate will be on the line asking you guys to find theirs! (L) That is a distinct possibility! (F) Along with requests for lotto numbers! "Yes, and for $59.95 we will be happy to oblige. No refunds!" [Laughter] (F) Yes, they can pay or shut up! If people are going to seek you out for their own benefits, they will just have to pay up. You would never have a moment's peace otherwise. Every 15 minutes the phone would ring. (L) I don't like that idea. (F) How could you not have thought of it? (L) Well, because we have never charged anybody anything. Never. (F) The point is, you are not soliciting business. It will solicit you. But... if we are going to all be involved in this solicitation of advice from the Cassiopaeans, we should ALL profit!

Frank wanted the site to be set up as a "pay to read" affair, and at several points, he hinted strongly that he wanted us to pay him to sit at the board. Needless to say, the relations deteriorated steadily after such remarks.

Some time ago, during another of the seemingly endless attacks from the forces that activated against us in a major way with the publication of the Wave Series, I included and excerpt from Mark Hedsel's book, The Zelator which expressed so perfectly our aim, purpose, and motivation:

MH: I set out to learn how to be a Fool.
OM: No, you set out the follow the Way of the Fool. There is a difference. And what is the result of such a journey? The result is a wise Fool. A fool is the one who gives up everything for an idea. The wise Fool is the one who knows that he never had anything to give up in the first place. Is that Foolish? ...Now, what is the difference between an old Fool and a young Fool?
MH: Is it commitment? The old man has committed himself, while the young one has not?
OM: Yes, exactly so. The old man has committed himself. He has made a stand. Life has made him do that. He has drawn a circle around himself, and said, "This is where I stand, this is what I must do." He has committed himself to an action.

Because he has drawn a circle around himself, others can see where he stands. He can be attacked by others. His position is weak. Those who have not committed themselves can mock, if they are so inclined. The one who has committed himself appears to be in a weak position. Yet the Spiritual truth is quite otherwise. It is the one who accepts commitment who is strong.

The true commitment is the artistic one. This is why artists are so often attacked. They are attacked for their morals, for their ideas - even for their work. Yet their essence - their commitment - is the secret which is unassailable. The true artist knows that creativity is its own reward. Ordinary people fear commitment, you see. Ordinary people fear creativity. They know that if they allow that seething cauldron of yellow liquid to boil over within themselves, then their whole lives will be changed. People fear change. People do not wish to be creative and artistic in any real sense. They wish to decorate, perhaps, and to make things around themselves pleasant - but this has little to do with creativity. All spiritual paths should be creative. Creativity is involved with sacrifice. That stew of yellow liquid which boils in everyone is a sacrificial broth...
MH: The sulphur?
OM: Yes, the sulphur. The first of the Three Principles. It is in a sacrificial cauldron. It is an excess. Creativity is Spiritual delight, and overpouring of sulphur. Some time ago you asked me about the word sulphur. We both agreed that Fulcanelli was right, and alchemical sulphur is the equivalent of the sexual energies in man and woman. The sexual energies may come out in a selfish way or in a creative way. Jakob Boehme saw the division in the word sulphur in a slightly different way. He divided the word itself, and said Sul was the soul of a thing, the oil. The Sul is born of the phur, the light. ...Have you ever looked at spilt oil? Under certain conditions it can look like a thin filament of a rainbow. This is the light imprisoned in the oil. The light rises upwards. It liberates the rainbow. It is as simple as that.
MH: Then all creative activity must be "foolish?" In which case, thinking must be "foolish?"
OM: Perhaps thinking is "foolish." Certain forms of thinking undoubtedly are "foolish." After all, most people are vulnerable in their ideas: they fear to think for themselves. The Fool learns to think for himself: he or she makes it an exercise of the soul. Others refuse that Way. This is why our civilization is so under threat. We are living in a world where every effort is being made to ensure that the body is comfortable, yet little is done for the growing soul.
MH:Creativity is itself, a form of selflessness?
OM: Exactly so. Creativity is the giving away of Spiritual energy. Creativity is the soul in the expenditure of a bottomless purse. One gives sulphur away - initially perhaps, through an excess of joy - that is the foolishness of the young. Later, one gives away energy through commitment to an idea. Creativity is the ultimate deed of unselfishness. When a man knows that creativity is its own reward... Well, then he is ready to work with people.You think of yourself as a loner. You do not see how much you are needed. You are needed to point the way.
MH: But I know nothing!
OM: You do not believe that when you sit before a group you do so alone? You are there as a representative of the spiritual world. Fools like myself become teachers, because we find suddenly that there is no one else. It's as simple as that. You realize how great is the gulf between you and others. There is a curtain between you. And you understand that this curtain is good for neither of you. The house out there is burning. You can see the flames, but those others cannot see the flames. ... Now the question is, can you leave those people in the flames? Would it not be the act of a Fool to snatch one, or perhaps two, out of the conflagration?
MH: If that is what they want.
OM: They cannot see the flames, but they do not wish to be burned. You see. You know that there are two sorts of flame. There is the soft and slow flame of the inner heat, and that terrible burning flame which consumes, and which feels no human pain. ...You cannot continue widening the gap between yourself and the world, What for others is light is for the Teacher an old light - another word for darkness.We live in a foolish paradox, for while we have forever, we do not have much time. [Hedsel, 2000]

What is that idea?

That brings us back to our group discussion. The idea is Truth. One of the group wrote so poignantly:

Why are we all spending much time and energy trying to discover and know the truth? It seems to me that to love the truth is what we are being asked to do. We are asked how much we love it. How much we are prepared to give to know it. But why do some people love the truth and others not? What is it about truth that is loveable and makes us yearn for it so much?

What is truth anyway? For me, the truth is the essence of something, its natural state, something as it really is. For me, it is really a quest for love, because to truly love something I must know it for what it really is. Perhaps we can sense in an unconscious way that there is a deeper truth to everything and everyone, and we are lead to search for the truth about it, so that we can truly love it for what it really is.

Are then knowledge and love the same thing? (J. Quinn, Ireland)

His post reminded me of the story of Sleeping Beauty - The princess Aurora, (The goddess Aurora also being the object of the seeking of Orion)... The prince must be clever and perspicacious; he must slash his way through a forest of thorns; he must battle a fire breathing dragon; and finally, he must locate the Princess in the tower and think, at the last moment that all was in vain... that there really is no hope. But even though she is apparently dead, and the cause is apparently lost, he bends to kiss her with a love that is pure and noble and seeks nothing for itself - a simple honoring of what she represents.

And with that willingness to honor something for no reason than that it inspires the heart through trials and troubles, attacks, and disaster, the miracle occurs.

That is sort of what it is like for us: it is a quest for something of Real Beauty - Truth.

And when you find that thing of Truth, you want to give everything to it - and that is impossible to do with lies. When we give ourselves to lies, we "become one" with them, and we become a lie as well. And most assuredly, if we are not willing to slash our way through a forest of thorns, and to battle fire breathing dragons, search diligently and pay ALL, we will attain nothing.

And it all comes down to giving love - giving ALL to those who ask. And it seems that the only real "asking" is "asking for Truth." God said "I was a treasure and I loved to be Known."

And somehow, I still believe that someone out there is asking.